Monday, December 29, 2008

Just the two of me.

ME: I regret so many things. Somedays I am so stupid and I make the worst choices in the world.
BETTER ME: But you are working on that. Experience will shape you into a better person if you let it.
ME: I love dreaming. I never want to wake up. I sleep all the time. I'm losing the battle agaisnt it again.
BETTER ME: You love the sunrise. You love the mornings. You can't lose. You'd miss them forever.
ME: My dreams are becoming terrible too. I never want to lay down at night.
BETTER ME: The night always tries to take you and sometimes you let it. Lay your head down.
ME: I still miss him.
BETTER ME: That didn't stay for a reason. You have to stick aroud and find out why.
ME: I can feel myself getting sicker. It's running through my veins.
BETTER ME: This is the one thing you cannot run from. You cannot run from yourself. It is not the end. It is not even the beginning of the end. It is the end of the beginning. If you can't let go now, you will miss the rest of the story.
ME: I need more time.
BETTER ME: Why live forever if you aren't even going to spend the time you have already living?

ME: I am alone.
BETTER ME: We both are. We may always be. But we have to find out.

ME: I'm scared.

Wednesday, December 24, 2008

Never a word to me of selfishness.

I sat. Looking through a window. Watching you ruin me. And I kept my mouth shut. I let you walk all over me. Use me. Hurt me. You didn't care. Selfishness consumed you and all you saw was a mirror. Watching yourself become what you wanted. But there I was on the other side. Seeing the same image you saw. Seeing the same problems. Watching them. Helping you fix them. But then I forgot myself. I had my own life to deal with. And it didn't matter. It was all you. And I let it be. And I still am.